Bella, what did that boy say?

When I picked Bella up at school today, her teacher had a very interesting report to give me. During circle time, Bella started laughing out loud, and if you know Bella, she laughs loud. When the teacher looked in Bella's direction, it appeared that what was making Bella laugh was a certain boy sitting next to her. He apparently had whispered something in her ear. Well, most of the kids had never heard Bella laugh, so in their delight, they began laughing too. It became so racous that the teacher just had to stop and enjoy the show. Now, what I want to know is.....what did that boy say to Bella? I've asked her and she won't tell me! I don't know what I'm going to do with her.

Pray for me 'cause I'm not ready for boys yet!

Jen and Giggly Bella

Nothin' Slowin' Her Down

Bella never ceases to amaze me. She has done very well with her chemo so far. The only change I've noticed is that she is not sleeping as well. Most of Thursday night was spent mainly in the TV room with her wanting to play and do her little flips from my lap. Friday she did much better, but Saturday and Sunday she, again, wanted to get up more than once. Needless to say, I'm pretty tired, but have had my helpers. Bella's Nana came over yesterday to watch her so that I could get some rest. We'll see how round two goes....

New Chemo

Bella began her new chemo treatment today. So far things are going well - no nausea, no vomiting. I'll be giving her medicine for nausea throughout the night and for most of tomorrow just as a precaution.

Talking with her doctor today helped tremendously. Most of the serious side effects (holes in the stomach/intestines, diarrhea, protein in the urine) are rare so that is a relief. I just keep praying that she will be spared from these. And the neuropathy (tingling in hands and feet) that I suspect she has been experiencing, may diminish a little.

So all is quiet in the Shoemaker household for now.

I just want to thank all of you for your words of encouragement. They really help me get through the tough times.

Love,

Jen and Bella

A Lost Battle, But Not a Lost War

So we received Bella's MRI report today. The tumor has started to grow again. Now Bella is facing a new coctail of chemo drugs for up to two years. I was so looking forward to her going off chemo at the end of December, so this is a big blow to me. Like always, I keep it together because I've always had to. I think there have been times when I have been criticized behind my back for not showing more emotion, but someone has to keep it together while everyone else falls apart. And by this point in time, it is like second nature to me. I don't have the luxury of falling apart, especially now. The most important thing for me is to provide a positive environment for Bella - full of laughter and love. So I hold it all in so that she doesn't hear the sadness in my voice or the gut wrenching sobs. Laughter is infectious and so is sadness. So I just keep on laughing.

People tell me how strong I am through all of this, but I cannot take any credit for it. My faith is what keeps me strong. God has carried me through all of this. I don't know why any of this is happening, but I know that God is with me and He's with Bella. Whatever our need has been, He has always pulled through for us. And I know He will continue into the future. So that is why I can say that we may have lost this small battle, but the war is not lost. Bella is a fighter and so am I. As long as she wants or has the strength to fight, I will do whatever she asks of me to help her.

Please keep us in your prayers.

Jen and Bella